A moment on the lips; a lifetime of issues
Now I don’t mean to dig up old ground, and I understand that this is not the first piece of writing surrounding this topic, nor will it be the last. However; why is it we all find ourselves attracted to the love rats? What is it we are actually attracted to? The heart ache? The thrill of the chase? The thought we could be the one to change them?
And also, what do we get left with? We get left with a bruised ego, doubt in self, general self-loathing and a hate of all things male. That terrible could-barely-call-it-a-relationship has left you with such issues, issues that will last long enough to destroy your next relationship. Which leaves me asking, why not nip it in the bud?
We are generations of mothers, sisters and aunts; all of which have had their head muddled, hearts torn apart and morals ignored. And yet we still haven’t learnt. Apart from the constant stories of friends who have been hurt; there is still that MASSIVE flashing warning light and siren over the head of the guy, but still we fall for the same tired lines, lies and boring sentiments. We still cling onto those feelings of lust, passion, uncertainty, the fleeting feeling of being unsure of what will happen next – the drama!
I know it may be very exciting; to be flung from pillar to post. The thrill of not being called for weeks, the wave of excitement that surges over you when he tells you something about his childhood – ‘Oh he must like me, he is telling me such intimate things’..NO…Just because someone tells you something personal, sometimes just means they are very clever at getting into your Primark pants.
I could tell you right now that when I was younger I had a fascination with toilets, whenever I went round someone’s house, I always had to go and check out their toilet, have a wee, suss it out. Just because I have let you into that personal bit of information, doesn’t mean I now want to have a long term relationship with you. Sorry to hurt you and all, but it just doesn’t work like that; I don’t feel that way about you.
What makes this a whole lot more depressing is actually, when you really look closely at the douche bag you just can’t let go of, he is normally not that big of a deal. Take a good hard look at him, does he support you? Does he look interested when you talk? OR do his eyes glaze over when you talk about something you are passionate about? Does he talk relentlessly about himself? And most importantly, does he look smug? Do not trust a smug one!
Now, obviously I am not telling you to flounce out of a dinner date, leaving your date there, alone, with a bit of pasta hanging off of his chin, because he looked down at his plate when you were talking. But, just keep an eye out, don’t be fooled. And also; don’t put your balls on the table, unless you know the guy is worth it. And we can always tell if the person is worth it, by asking our urban family (friends), most of them will tell you straight if the guy is a sleaze.
Furthermore, we females are the most intuitive things, yet we don’t warn our fellow vagina owner! We just let it happen and help pick up the pieces when it all blows up in her beautiful face. But we could have stopped it. So, next time you see your friend getting wrapped up in some smug guy, just give her the heads up!
WARN A SISTER